the high art of independent play

Unleash their imagination!

Let’s chat about a topic that honestly wasn’t easy for me: promoting independent play in our little ones. As our kids grow, fostering their ability to play on their own becomes not just a sanity-saver but also a crucial part of their development. We all know how important it is for our little ones to develop their creativity, problem-solving skills, and, of course, have some fun on their own.

Firstly let’s have a look at realistic expectations for different age groups and then dive into some tips!

Babies (0-1 year):

Babies are like little sponges, soaking in the world around them. While they can’t play independently for long, short periods of “tummy time” or lying on a play mat with colorful toys can encourage them to explore and engage with their surroundings. You might snag 10-15 minutes of solo play here and there, and it’s a perfect time to grab a quick cup of coffee!

Toddlers (1-3 years):

The toddler years, where curiosity knows no bounds! Independent play at this age is about simple activities. Think building blocks, puzzles, or exploring art supplies. Encourage it by setting up safe play spaces and gradually extending the time. You can expect 20-30 minutes of solo play, maybe enough to start dinner or catch your breath.

Preschoolers (3-5 years):

Preschoolers are little explorers and inventors. They enjoy imaginative play and can engage in it for more extended periods. Activities like dress-up, building with Lego, or playing with dolls or action figures can keep them occupied for 30-45 minutes or even more. This is when you can fold that mountain of laundry or sneak in some work.

School-age kids (6+ years):

As kids enter the school-age phase, their ability to play independently skyrockets. They can enjoy hobbies, read, build intricate creations, or immerse themselves in video games or art projects for up to an hour or more. You might even find yourself with a solid chunk of me-time for that book you’ve been meaning to read!

So far for expectations.

Please keep in mind that every kid is different. As with any other skill, every child has their own timeline to develop it and they have their own character.

My girl doesn’t like playing alone at all, so I had to work hard to get to the 30-45 minutes I might get now sometimes. But I just need to be babysitting for a friend and she’ll be off playing alone while I can take care of the baby. For some unfathomable reason she just needs another kid in the house.

In my experience there are children that are just naturally more inclined to play by themselves and be happy staying at home than others, and usually you’ll see more independent play when there is a sibling around.

You’ll have to work with what you got and if they need you to play with them, remember – they grow up so fast and soon you’ll miss the times they were asking for you!

To encourage independent play, here are some tips that might help:

Create a safe play space

Designate an area in your home as a dedicated play zone. This can be a corner of the living room, their room, or even just a blanket fort. Having a specific area sends a clear message that it’s time for play.

Especially for little ones it’s easier if they feel close to you. We started on the living room rug, with me being in sight in the kitchen cooking or folding laundry, and now have moved on to my daughter’s room.

Stick to a schedule

Set a routine that includes independent playtime. Kids are creatures of habit and like to know what to expect. Have specific times you encourage independent play, like after breakfast and lunch or before dinner. Look for the times that work best for you, stick with it and start slow.

Offer choices

Have a small selection of toys out so your child can pick an activity they’re passionate about. 2-3 options should be enough (more can be overwhelming). Over time they might not even need those play prompts anymore, once they now their favorites for playtime.

Rotate toys

Don’t keep all your child’s toys out at once. Instead, put some away and rotate them every few weeks. This keeps things fresh and exciting, as it’s like getting new toys without the expense.

Open-ended toys

Toys that encourage creativity and open-ended play are fantastic. Think building blocks, art supplies, dolls and dress-up costumes. These types of toys allow your child to take the lead in their playtime.

Mess is okay

Remember that a bit of mess is a sign of a great play session. Let your child have fun and be imaginative, even if it means cleaning up a bigger mess afterward.

Be patient

Sometimes, it takes a little time for kids to get into the groove of independent play. Don’t be discouraged if it doesn’t happen right away. It’s a skill that takes practice.

Praise and encourage

When you see your child engaged in independent play, offer praise and encouragement. Let them know how proud you are of their imagination and creativity.

Do not disturb

Never ever interfere while they’re playing by themselves. It’s sometimes tempting to bring them a new toy or make a suggestion, but how do you like being interrupted when you’re working?

And remember, these are just rough guidelines. Every child is unique, and some may need more or less independent playtime. But by promoting these times you help them develop essential life skills, all while having loads of fun.

So, go ahead and create a nurturing environment that encourages your little one to explore, discover, and unleash their boundless imagination!

the high art of independent play

Unleash their imagination!

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